A glazed doughnut, hold the anthrax

Find out who's hot and who's not at the Mr. Heterosexual Contest in Worcester next month.

I received mail informing me that "Big Lithuanian company is looking for managers." The message also says that it doesn't contain spam, which, of course, means the obvious.

While doing some online banking, I occasionally enter some information in the wrong format. For example, if I enter one hundred dollars as 100, the web site will display a message that I'm an idiot because I'm supposed to include two decimal places: 100.00. It requires more work from the programmer to detect the errant format and then put up the message than it to just stick .00 at the end of the 100 and be done with it. Grumble, grumble.

You have to have a license to drive a car, build a house, own a dog, and some would claim you need a license for your pet fish, but you don't need a license to have kids.

Know that when the terrorists strike again, your Krispy Kreme doughnuts in Des Moines will be protected.

Back home in the snow and ice

With this regimen of travel, I've become methodical in the way that I pack for each trip. It's not only clothes, but also chargers for laptop, phone, and iPod, along with meds and other of life's essentials. A few years ago, I made a quick trip to Denver. I stayed a no-frills hotel near the airport. On the way back to the hotel one night, I picked up my supper at a convenience store - yogurt, fruit, maybe some pretzels. It was a few miles back to the hotel. (The airport is way out of town on the prairie.) When I got back to my room, I discovered that I didn't have a spoon for the yogurt. The hotel didn't have a restaurant and I didn't feel like getting in the car and driving someplace. So, I ate the yogurt with my toothbrush. I now keep a spoon in my briefcase.

There was no snow on the ground in White Plains and only a smattering until I reached Hartford.

Will this guy please shut up?

I got a dose of bromidrosis during last night's ride home, putting to rest my concerns that Sirius wouldn't play Frank Zappa.

If anyone buys these cat-claw covers, please let us know about your experiences putting them on your cat. It's got to be close to giving a cat a bath or a pill.

Dessication Row

The hotel where I stay is nice enough, but is showing signs of wear. The sign atop the building, for example, says, Crow e Plaza Hotel. Not all of the buttons in the elevators light up. The carpet is worn on high-traffic corners. The heating system is pretty much on or off and the air is as dry as the Gobi.

But, they do offer wireless Internet access, free if you're a member of the frequent stayer program. The staff is courteous. I don't know about the restaurant; I've not eaten there. I pick up my meals at the Whole Foods restaurant a block away and dine in my room, watching the mediocre local New York news. You know that the media capital of the world is in trouble when the Fox station offers the best news programming.

Yesterday's meetings were interesting. One of the engineers was presenting information about our new product to the people who would be installing and configuring the software at the customers' sites. Instead of using PowerPoint, the engineer used the documents that I wrote. Pretty cool, I thought, until we discovered a few minor mistakes in the document, things that you might not notice until you put it up on the big screen. So, today, I have to update the docs and deliver them anew.

Looking for an exotic vacation this winter? How about a bus tour of storm-ravaged New Orleans, courtesy of Gray Line New Orleans.

From "The More I Meet People, The More I Like My Dog" department, we learn that nursing home residents with rather spend time with a visiting dog than with each other.

Tunes from the sky

Another year, another trip to White Plains. Yesterday's drive started in moderate snow and faded to light rain across Connecticut. I left behind a half foot of snow; there's almost none on the ground here.

To make the three-hour trip a bit more pleasurable, I decided to get satellite radio. I chose Sirius, not because of Howard Stern, but because Sirius has the CBC and world news radio than does XM. One channel offers English-language broadcasts from national radio stations around the world, including countries such as Slovakia, China, Sweden, Ireland, and other locations.

The music selections are also pretty good. I've yet to hear any Frank Zappa or Peter Green-era Fleetwood Mac, but they do have a good selection of surf music on their 60s channel. Yesterday, I listened to Jackson Browne's "The Load Out/Stay." That was (and perhaps still is) a favorite when, at the end of a trade show, we'd strike the set and get the equipment onto the trucks, heading back home or perhaps to another show.

Of course, Sirius isn 't meant to replace my iPod or stop my drift into iPod oblivion.

I'm not looking for a new job and, even if I was, it wouldn't be for a job as a cartoon artist. Scott Adams, of Dilbert fame, is helping another cartoonist find an artist to work on a syndicated strip. BTW, Scott Adams was one of the first, if not the first, to put an email address on the comic strip. This was in the early 90s, '92 or '93, perhaps.

If you're interested, you might want to practice here. You can see how well you draw and also learn what you draw says about you.

Of course, if your drawings reveal that you need psychiatric help, there's one place you probably don't want to go. The Citizens Commission on Human Rights, a group founded by the Church of Scientology, has opened the 'Industry of Death' Museum, an exhibit on the horrors brought about by the psychiatric profession.

A Tuesday that is like a Monday, mostly

Lily was scheduled to start at her new school today, but the weather had other plans for her today. We have four inches of heavy wet snow on the ground here. The forecast calls for more.

There isn't a day that goes by that I don't say, "I work hard, but this isn't hard work."

The latest security hole identified in Windows is particularly nasty. (More info here.) It has the potential to infect a system just by viewing an otherwise innocent-looking image (in the Windows Metafile, .wmf, format). At this writing, even systems with up-to-date anti-virus software and fully patched systems are vulnerable. What to do? Well, it's a good idea to practice safe surfing for a while, staying away from non-mainstream web sites. Using another browser is good, too. Firefox users can be hit, but only if they accept the download of the infected file. For some folks, using another operating system is a good choice - Mac OS, for example. Damn Small Linux (DSL) is about 50MB and can run from a USB drive without affecting your Windows installation.

Zippy didn't say it, but someone had to: "BEEB WIN BELLS TELLY DING-DONG"

Niece Lori moved to California this past year and loves it. Californians don't need these, but one of these might come in handy.

I've known cats all of my life. They can be affectionate and funny, but my sense of urgency has never translated into any action on the cat's part.

The twoth of the new year

A friend of a friend is the mother of a junior high school girl. The mother wouldn't allow the daughter to go to a particular dance. "You're, you're," sputtered the daugher. "You're so Amish."

It was odd not to have any college footballs games on TV yesterday. Time was, New Year's Day was dominated by the four major bowl games - Cotton, Sugar, Rose, and Orange, all without corporate sponsors. Today we have the AT&T Cotton Bowl Classic, Tostitos Fiesta Bowl, and Nokia Sugar Bowl.

Yesterday we went to visit my father, who's doing remarkably well. Adam visited with him last week and recorded several hours of story-telling as my father recounted his times riding the rails during the Depression.

After our visit, Sandra and I drove in to the camp. The road was icy and covered with three inches of fresh snow, but the Subaru walked up the hill as nicely as you please. Everything at the camp was in good order, inside and out. Coming down the camp road was, um, interesting. We slid down half the hill, gliding gently out into the roadway below.

We arrived home in time to see Doug Flutie's drop-kick, the first in pro football since 1941.

Today's automated search for a technical documentation job brought a listing for a Emercency Room Director.

So, one of them says, "Let's paint a baseball 20,000 times." And, the other one says, "Good idea."

It was sad to learn that Dave Barry has permanently given up his weekly column. He was on sabbatical for 2005. He will, however, continue write occasional pieces such as his year in review and blog, which leads us to such essential knowledge as Roto-Rooter's Top Five Drainpipe Recoveries of 2005.

Click and Clack give advice about replacing your headlight fluid (second letter).

Dwell on the past and you'll lose an eye; forget the past and you'll lose both eyes

We met our project deadline at work. I added my final two documents to the build at 11:15, 45 minutes ahead of schedule. Relieved and congratulatory emails richocheted around the group for the rest of the afternoon. We also learned that the sales group closed another large account, giving us additional work for the coming year. We made it. We can use the long weekend to breathe and then get going again.

My manager let us out early. So, Sandra and I went to visit with Adam, Jennie, and Lily. We had our first visit to their new house, a log cabin on eight acres in one of the hill towns just a bit further west. It's a nifty place, with both warmth and openess. Lily will start at her new school on Tuesday; the family will move a few weeks later. After the visit, we went to one of Lily's favorite restaurants, a Mongolian barbeque place in Hadley. Although there were no Mongolians to be seen, we dined well and had lots of good talk and laughter.

Today we hope to gather up some of Mike and Lynn's kids to go to the latest Harry Potter movie.

Snow is in the forecast for this evening, making travel even more treacherous. Tonight is amateur night, a time when lots of otherwise well-behaved people get drunk. The serious drunks are apt to take the night off, preferring to show their stuff when everyone least expects it, like some Tuesday morning in March. Anyway, the serious drunks have known for a long time that there's no cure for a hangover; here's the science. If you want to avoid a hangover, don't take that first drink.

In case you were wondering, Hiatchi claims that The Hard Drive is the New Bling.

It's nice of people to share their dreams with us. This guy, for example, wanted to set the record for the longest ear hair. And, this guy implanted an RFID chip in himself.

[The title for this entry comes from an Russian proverb, quoted by Solzhenitsyn at the start of The Gulag Archipelago.]

As I've mentioned in the past, I don't typically make New Year's resolutions. If a good habit is worth starting, any day is fine. It was 20 years ago yesterday, I just remembered, when I had my last cigarette. Here are, nevertheless, some tips for setting goals, whether those goals are set tomorrow on New Year's Day or some Thursday in November or some Tuesday in March.

Stuff left in the toe of the Christmas stocking

We're putting in some long days this week as we head toward our project deadline of noon on Friday. There are times during the day when a nap would be helpful, but it's not to be. We'll just hope that the coffee supply holds up.

It's election season in Canada. A question that I'd never asked once, let alone frequently: "Is someone allowed to eat a ballot?" (Hint: No.)

And when we're through wondering what our neighbors to the north are doing for the future of civilization, we look across the pond and find that Sienna Miller is the most admired woman among teenaged British girls. Paris Hilton was #8 on the list. Paris Hilton. My theory is that Alistair Cook's bones weren't stolen, but that the spinning in his grave sent the bones too deep to be found.

Another holiday recipe - Creamy Spam Broccoli Casserole. Nice touch - skim milk and low-fat cheese to go with the Spam.

Finally, during flu season, never let anyone lick your keyboard.

I'm pretty sure that the pogo stick isn't ours

We're awakening to a quiet house, a light rain falling outside and fog rolling over the snow. Inside, there's a lot to pick up, clean up, and put away. There are several half-pies on the table and lots of leftovers in both refrigerators. And then there's the pogo stick, still in its box, "Lots of good healthy fun and exercise, indoors and outdoors." And, as the fog lifts, I can see two snowboards in the back yard.

It was a great party and everyone contributed. Sandra did most of the planning and lots of the cooking. People helped us fill the dishes before the meal and wash the dishes afterward. (Marley did his party, pre-washing many of the serving dishes and pans.)

I've kept people posted about our lives through this journal. Niece Lori asked, "So, who is Blaugustine?" I explained that Liz and I had worked together for several years at a previous company and that we now kept in touch via email and blogs. Juliet's health concerns became part of the dinner conversations.

While I was in our office, showing Michael and Joe how to put music files on their MP3 players, our granddaughters and Jennie's sister, Julie, were playing hide-and-go-seek around the house.

Folks left a bit after six. We fed 35 people. We'd parked our cars at the drug store parking lot about a quarter mile away, giving us more room in our driveway. Sandra, Marley, and I walked down to get the cars, enjoying the cool and quiet night.

Today we'll visit my father, bringing him a couple of meals of leftovers. We bought him a pair of Yaktrax so that he can walk across the ice more easily to get to his wood pile.

Bark us all bow-wows of folly

We went to Mike and Lynn's for a bit of Christmas Eve gift-giving and a dinner of Chinese food (nothing like this on the menu, though). Before the meal, we (Sandra and her parents and yours truly) drove around to see the Christmas lights. Some families have done put up glorious displays. Several years ago, we spent Christmas at Prince Edward Island. There the lights on the houses were even more hopeful because the houses are so far apart, the only bits of color and light in a dark night.

As Curly said, I have a cold and I don't smell so good. Soon the house will be filled with the smells of beef and turkey and veggies and pies and stuff(ing). People will arrive around noon and we expect to eat at 2:00. The weather is nice, so the kids can play in the yard, using their new sleds on the crusty snow.

Our kitchen is in the middle of our house. Even though I'll spend most of my time cooking, everyone has to pass through the kitchen on their way to anywhere else, so I'll get to see everyone and talk with most.

This is a needed time for a break from work. We have a very big deal deadline at noon on Friday. (If we don't deliver, the company doesn't get paid.) I have a rule that I can give one 70-hour week in each release. With Christmas weekend, I'll have long days, but I'll have a chance to recuperate. It means that I get to work my 40 hours in three days, instead of five.

We received lots of nice Christmas cards and newsletters. We're going to write back; at least we want to. The mailings may not get out until Groundhog's Day, though. As a friend observes - Don't be sorry. Change.

My Blackberry arrived and I've had a chance to play with a bit. Lots of features that I'm sure will be fun to play with while observing the posted speed limits on our interstate highways. The biggest deal about the Blackberry, I think, came when I was placing the order. I was trying to decide between a one-year and two-year contract. There was a significant savings in placing a two-year order, but I was hesitant because I wasn't sure if my job would be around in two years. "Don't worry," said our office administrator, confidently. I placed a two-year order.

The rest of the lyrics for Deck Us All With Boston Charlie/Bark Us All Bow-Wows of Folly are here.

In the time-honored tradition ...

The Red Sox let another of their best players get away, to the Yankees no less. There's no question that Johnny Damon is getting a lot of money from New York, more than $50M over four years. (Although he'll have to cut his hair and beard to get it.) The Red Sox could afford it and they need a high-energy guy like Damon to spark the team. I didn't mind losing Wade Boggs or Roger Clemens to the Yankees because they were arrogant and self-centered ballplayers. Damon, we'll miss. A lot.

Nothing says that you're celebrating Jesus' birth like:

• iPod boxer shorts
• Coyote fur hat
• Bacon-cooking alarm clock

And, of course, interesting opportunities keep showing up in my automated searches for technical documentation jobs:

• Looking for Cosmetolgist or Barber for a fun, relaxed sports enviorment [sic]
  
• CAREER BELLS RING, ARE YOU LISTENING? GM/CHEF OPENINGS NOW! (a sing-along)

The four candidates seeking the Canadian prime minister's post had a debate in French in Vancouver last week. They'll have a debate in English in Québec.

With the amount that I'm traveling for work, I'll be getting a Blackberry. The folks who make the Blackberry, Research in Motion (RIM), have been in a nasty legal dispute with NTP regarding patents that may or may not have been infringed. It's doubtful that RIM would let the Blackberries go dark; there are too many users and there is too much money involved. But, then, the Red Sox did let Johnny Damon get away.

Dice - Position 237

My automated job searches for a technical documentation position turned up this one: Dice - Position 237: "Heliarc Welder - local candidates need only apply". It's a job that my father could easily do, but he enjoys his retirement too much.

Canadian Cottage Holidays - Cottage rental and resort listings across Canada

Canadian Cottage Holidays - Cottage rental and resort listings across Canada: "from the hot sand dunes of Prince Edward Island..."

PEI, the new Malibu.

Messages as we find them

Seeing my mother's handwriting and reading her affirmations is just like hearing her voice. And she loved Papermate pens with the blue ink.

Collateral damage in a field of white

We picked up better than a foot of snow on Friday, the bulk of it coming in just a few hours. I worked from home and learned via email that the office was closed by mid-afternoon. The snow was light and the snowblower moved it away easily until the end. We cover the snowblower with a tarp during the off-hours. When it's time to start the cleanup, I remove the tarp and set it aside on top of the snow on the lawn. As I was returning the snowblower to its place, my glasses were covered with snow and, well, the snowblower inhaled the tarp, thick blue plastic wrapped around the auger. Yesterday morning, I spent nearly an hour cutting away the tarp, leaving a ground cover of blue confetti.

A couple of weeks ago, my father was getting his Jeep ready for the season. It started, but sounded a bit rough. He removed the air filter and found that it was filled with acorns.

Can you hear me now? Woof.

Gmail, Google's mail service, has a new feature called Web Clips. It presents links to news stories and, occasionally, advertisements. Gmail has a very good junk mail filter and puts all suspected junk mail into a Spam folder. When I go to clean out that folder, I also get a link for Spam recipes, such as Gingered Spam Salad.

The pace of work is picking up. We have a major project due on the 30th, with a contract payment contingent on product delivery. People have been even-tempered, a nice turn. I have had a couple of engineers provide helpful reviews of the documents I'm writing. In turn, I have a few cycle to help another team. I'll go White Plains for a couple of days to determine how best I can help with the other project.

We've started planning our family Christmas dinner. We'd originally counted 34 people, but several won't be able to join us. We have our menu planned. We're fortunate that Christmas comes on a Sunday, giving us an extra day for preparation. But, we're most fortunate that we have a family that wants to join us for the holiday. We have many blessings.

Goodle Good News - Funny Stuff - David McCandless

Goodle. Good news doesn't come easily; someone has to make it happen.

Well, there goes the neighborhood

A few cubicles opened up near my manager, so my co-workers and I moved recently. I did my best to clean my old cube before I moved and expect that the former tenant did the same. That said, there was an empty "Break The Curse" cookie package along with clear evidence that mice had dined well.

This new area is noisier than my previous location, all the more reason to crank up the tunes. I record broadcasts from radio stations over the Internet and then listen to them on my own schedule. Lately there have been a lot of tributes to the guitar great, Link Wray, who died last month.

You'd think that New York would have world-class TV news. It is, after all, the largest city in the country, the media capital, and the home of newspapers such as the New York Times and Wall Street Journal. Nope. The TV news, at least what I've seen of the morning and evening offerings, isn't much better than the hyperventilated happy talk that we get locally. Heck, the small market stations, such as Manchester NH or Springfield MA, do just as well. And, with the local stations, you stand a chance of seeing clips from high school football games.

Next week we're having a holiday party at work. (Oh, bliss.) We were asked to bring foods from our ethnic traditions. I persuaded my boss that it wouldn't be a good idea to bring Finnish cuisine to a civilized gathering. I remember avoiding the pickled herring and baked turnip, but that's just the beginning. This article, for example, offers such gastronomic bombshells as fish aspic and lamprey. A cousin has had a business exporting dried reindeer meat, the perfect appetizer for a Christmas gathering. "Here, friends, have some Rudolph."

Happy 92nd Birthday, Huck.

Human Edge Software - First Class Overview

Human Edge Software - First Class Overview: "
First Class is synonymous with timetabling excellence."

...in case you were wondering.

Ice and snow and away we go

The weather forecast is calling for a stormy week, with wind and rain on Tuesday, possibly mixing with ice or snow, and then more precipitation that could give us snow cover by Thanksgiving. Today I'll bring the snow blower from behind the back shed and get it ready, just in case.

The ponds and sheltered portions of the lakes have a skim coat of ice. Yesterday we talked with someone who works at Mt. Wachusett, the ski area, not the college, She said that there was a chance that the mountain would be open for skiing this week. They've been making snow for a few days, covering several trails.

Sandra's parents returned from PEI on Friday and are settling for winter in Holden. It's nice to have them around. They're good company and good housemates.

It will be nice not to travel this week. I've gone to White Plains for five of the eight weeks in my new job, enough for me to know my way around the supermarkets, parking lots, and highways. The hotels that we use a typical business hotels, nicer than a Motel 6, but not a Trump Tower. High-speed Internet access is becoming standard, like air conditioning. With IBM nearby, White Plains is something of a technology center, but that doesn't stop politicians from making silly proposals. Most of the time, I buy my supper at Whole Foods, a natural food store, and go back to my room. One night I went out to dinner with some of the systems engineers who travel something like 40 weeks a year. They've been on the road too long and live at a pace that's too much for me.

My automated searches for technical documentation jobs are still finding some gems: Sensory Science Research Associate. "The successful candidate will set up and run sensory panels used to evaluate edible oils, food and beverages....Our Client develops, manufactures and sells naturally produced products from microalgae and fungi."

I've dressed pretty much the same way since high school - button-down shirts, slacks, loafers, ooccasionally a pocket protector. Most of my co-workers dress comparably, with a just a few folks in jeans and t-shirts. The IT industry, as rule, however, is pretty badly dressed. At Digital, one of the engineers wore red, flannel pajamas to work. (I don't think that they were the kind with the feet and the drop seat.)

As you prepare for Christmas, don't forget your USB-powered Christmas tree. (Google translation of the page is here.)

They shall not grow old

They shall not grow old: "They shall not grow old, as we who are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We shall remember them. "

Thank a veteran today, if only in your remembrances.

Like a dog circling before it lies down, we're getting ready for winter. The outdoor furniture is put away. The storm windows are in place. The little heater that keeps the birdbath ice-free is plugged in. Sandra's parents will be returning from PEI next week. John Gardner talked about locking time, that time in November when things start to freeze up in New England. It's been mild this fall, so things are running a week to 10 days late. The big maple next to our house usally drops its leaves by Halloween; it's just now shedding the last. It was 25 this morning, so we're still moving toward winter.

Grandson Joe broke his arm Wednesday night. In a pig pile with his cousins, his arm went south while he went north. We saw him briefly last night and he was comfortable, able to give that great Joe smile.

Things are returning to normal in Ottawa. Mysterious radio signals were causing automatic garage doors to misbehave. The Canadians were blaming the American embassy. Someone could make a nice living selling tin-foil hats in the capital.

In today's almost-a-good-idea department: what could let drivers pay even less attention to the road ahead? A chance to watch traffic videos on their cell phones.

The other night, we had high winds which seem to have unsettled Marley. He was barking often through the night. It may be time to order an Anxiety Wrap for him. He's too big for a hoodie bed.